its stupid times like when i don't care enough about bullying my little brother out of my favorite couch anymore that i realize even though i'm happy to be home - i'm detached. my parents think i'm living here after graduation. so cute.
but really, i've led a pretty babied life. my parents, however strict - have done everything and more for me, and i understand how lucky i am. all they want in return is someone i'm clearly not. i do feel indebted to them, obliged to be at least satisfactory in their eyes. but i can't hide so much of who i am for four straight months in a row again. yes friends, i'm talking about next summer already, summer 2009 - the last guaranteed time of youth, freedom and sunshine for us '10 grads.
the plan:
inspiration:
i want to see the country, from east to west. you know - open skies and mountains - all the way to the pacific ocean.. on a bike! and you can't really understand how you live until you see how other people do it.
only one thing's stopping me from pedaling onwards...
studying abroad felt just as impossible, but i managed to pull that off as an academic thing. i don't think my parents grasp this sort of education, and it's such a crutch sometimes. i'm scared of missed opportunities.
when, alright *if* (trying to be optimistic!), bike & build fails, i'll get a job as a waitress and learn about the different people in the world that way. i think it's the kind of job everyone should have at least once in their life. i know it'll be hard and often miserable, that i should maybe get an externship like i originally planned - but hey, it's not like i'm going to have trouble getting a job with a BSN under my belt. looking back, that extra step or sacrifice never really brought me proportional rewards anyway. i have the rest of my life to be career-oriented. and i plan to live long. right now, the young crazy years are running out and i need to do something i'll never have the chance to do again. something i can only do now.
but then again, i change what i think about things around every 4 months. if you told me in a year i will have cut off all my hair, dyed it purple and quit school to be a groupie - i would believe you.
2 comments:
It's your parent's job to love and worry, it's your job to give them a reason to love you and make them worry.
you could turn it into some sort of "academic" experiment. some lady decided she wanted to roadtrip across the WORLD (where her car couldnt' swim, it floated in a ferry) and found a way to get a company to fund her "expenses." in the end, it was an oil company bc she did an experiment to find how to travel in the most fuel efficient way.
perhaps you could document the most bodily efficient way on bike and pass that off as academic to your parents?
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